Birthmother's Day

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I love Birthmother's Day.

It is a day when I can celebrate that I am strong.

That i continue to be strong.

It is when I know and remember that I did the right thing for my beautiful Josie.

The day I remember how I went through being pregnant and single in a VERY single town. That I still held my head up high and did what I needed to do.

This is the day I get to remember all the beautiful people who God has brought into my life through the beauty of adoption. i only wish that I could name all of them personally and by name and show all their pictures. There are too many.

I remember my best friends in the entire world. I met them because I was pregnant. Who stood by my side from start to finish and are still there beside me when I go through hard days.

I get to bring up that i was in labor for way freaking too long to be normal or necessary, and had to push for doubly too long to be normal. I get to say, these stretch marks are from that experience.

I get to remember those quiet moments I spent, holding Josie so close. Telling her she was beautiful. Crying to her, telling her I loved her and I knew I was doing the right thing. I remember smelling her head and thinking she smelled of Heaven.

This is the day I remember that even though it was the hardest thing in the world, I signed those papers. I found some sort of strength and peace. I remember being surrounded by angels, both here and in heaven.

I celebrate the fact that I was strong enough to bring Josie into this world and do what I had to do.

I love my Josie bear, my gungadeen jeanne, my precious little baby. I love adoption. I love my beautiful heartbreak.